You would not believe how my life has been this past month. ZOMG. Try crazy. Frustrating. Heartbreaking. Stressful. More than slightly desperate. But mainly, bloody hard going. There have been more days that I care to remember in the last four weeks when I’ve woken up and silently pleaded with the universe: “Please, please, please… let today be a good day.” As it stands, it’s fairly safe to say that 2010 will be remembered as my family’s ‘Annus Horribilis’. Quite honestly, the Provider and I have definitely earned our parenting stripes these last few weeks; I feel like we need to have a day-long debrief session just to give ourselves time to catch our collective breaths. And then enjoy a drink. Or three.
That’s life – or mine at least – and it goes on. As it should. But holy crap, who knew being a parent was this hard? And why the hell was this not mentioned in the glossy colour brochure? There’s a saying somewhere that goes a little like this: ‘God and/or Life never gives you more than you can handle.’ *coughs* Can I just say that ‘God and/or Life’ has an over-inflated opinion of what I can deal with at one time? FFS. Give a girl a break. Yes, I survived (as did the Provider, without whom I would not have coped, bless him) but there were moments when I felt powerless and totally unable to change the course of events unfolding around us. So not fun.
While I realise you can never be totally prepared for what the future brings, it definitely helps if you’ve got good people around you. I’m very fortunate in that I do. There’s nothing like a bit of drama to bring out the best in some people and I can’t help but wonder if maybe that’s the upside in this whole thing. Never knowing what we’re capable of until it gets right down to the wire. Finding out how well we cope under a bit of pressure. (I think we managed okay. *g*)
However, after a month of more twists and turns than a Cedar Point roller coaster I’m quite happy to have a little less excitement around here, at least for a little while. I’m just getting back to sleeping better at night. *g*